Since my last blog I've made every excuse I could find not to blog. What seems strange now that I am blogging at 5:30 am this morning is that the one place I could say what I want and feel real and be myself I have avoided. Blogging is a sheet a paper where you can either let all of your deepest thoughts out or give the most powerful advice. Some blogs I've read or even came across were used for venting, ranting or screaming. I don't get to read blogs that often but when I do I either learn something or get so discouraged that I don't read blogs again for a long time. Lately, there has been so much on my plate (no pun intended) , that it has become close to impossible to blog. Maybe the busy work was an excuse to keep me further and further away so that I did not have to put all of my thoughts out there or have the responsibility of answering to who ME!!!!.
I have gained over 50lbs in the past 3 years it did not creep up on me EITHER. And I can no longer say how did this happen another dumb excuse I've made up for myself. I know how it happen, I've allowed the weight to creep back on . Matter a fact the pounds did not creep back on me the pounds piled on quickly. It is in plain sight my clothes are so tight the news have spread to the rest of my body that my size 18 pants just will not cut it anymore. I remember telling myself that I would not buy a size 20 pants because it would indicate that I have gain . So the longer I stayed in the size 18 pants and a extra large shirt the longer it took for me to face reality. That not only have I fallen off the wagon, but the wagon had fallen on me.
It's been almost 4 years since I've purchase a pair of size 24 pants and a 3x shirt. It seems like yesterday, I was in a size 16 pants and a medium shirt. Oh I can still visualize my big smile that day I went into the store and tried on a 14\16 dress. Priceless!!!!!!! That was damn near four years ago, when I believe in exercise of any kind walking was my exercise of choice and I ate fruits and veggies and not the fine sugars. I watch what went on my plate and also my intake. I was not fooled by the reasons for the seasons eating and enjoying the fine foods of Thanksgiving and Christmas. "NOPE" not me I stuck to my will to eat right and live long. I talked the talk and walked the walk. I was a living and breathe inspiration to others. My memory has not failed me and it has a lot to do with the size 14 dresses that I have hanging in my closet that brings back so many memories of yesterday feels so nostalgic.
There is only one thing stopping me from reliving those good memories. That one thing would be
ME !!!!!!!!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment